A woman I know adopted a baby from an Eastern European country. Someone who worked in our city’s education system said “But when she grows up, how will you understand what she’s saying?”

“Tampons have asbestos in them to make you bleed more so you need to buy more of them,” from a girl at a bar, roughly 2003/2004. I just laughed and said “Where’d you hear that, on the internet?” as this was the era of chain emails and non-facts floating around online. Not surprisingly, yes, she did read it online.

On a tour bus in Italy. Tourist kept asking to see Pinocchio’s grave. Tour guide explained he wasn’t a real boy. Tourist again said, but where is he buried? He just wasn’t understanding.

“Kansas isn’t a real state…. Hahaha….. it was in the wizard of oz” in sophomore year of high school I heard this……

“How do left handed people drive?” -my sister As she then proceeded to try and drive “left footed”

After a work accident a co worker asked me, with a very serious face, would my finger grow back .

Something to the effect of “Mice turn into those big nasty rats when they get older.” This person didn’t know that mice and rats were different species

“What’s chicken made out of?” -my dumbass of an older brother

My bother in law plastered baby oil all over his body and sat out in the sun for 2hrs. I told him he was going to get skin cancer. His response “I don’t believe in skin cancer”. This is the guy who refuses to have a microwave in his house because “they are bad for you”.

“I thought snow was just the dust that blows off mountains and rain was when the snow melted” 23year old in one of my uni classes.

Overhearing a conversation on a cruise deck between two people: “Look at how many stars there are out there.” “Yeah, they’re actually pretty big too. If one crashed all the way in the water over there, it bet it would splash us over here”

“I think being cryogenically frozen would be cool because you could see the future. I’d have to bring a space heater or a blanket or something though. I don’t like being cold.” -Star basketball player in my high school health class.

I worked at a hippy crystal store in the mall. These girls come up and are looking at our amethyst cathedrals (BIG pretty chunks of amethyst). One reached out to touch it and her friend immediately held her back and pulled her away, yelling “Don’t touch that! It’s Asthmathyst! Being around it gives you asthma!!” She was genuinely upset…I stopped dead in my tracks when I heard that one.

A roommate had to walk to work 2 km in the sun. He asks me how he’d stop his head getting burnt…and asked me for advice on how to put sunscreen in his hair. I suggested a hat. He was floored (mouth dropped open) and thought it was a great solution. He told me I was so clever.

Leaving the movie “Titanic” in 1997; I passed a person and overheard them say, “That movie was so unrealistic, no ship like that would sink.” Legit hadn’t heard of the sinking of the Titanic and thought the events in the movie were fiction.

My girlfriend and I were playing a mobile trivia game against each other and one of the questions was about pearl harbor. I quote: “I didn’t know when Pear Harbor died. How was I supposed to know?”

a girl I used to know thought that Alaska was an island because it “has its own box at the bottom of the map next to hawaii”

“London is the Paris of New York”, said my friend after a few drinks. We never let him forget it.